Friday, September 30, 2011

Parenting: Teens With Cell Phones

Teen Diva is having some school issues. The kind that we decided to begin emailing teachers to kind of keep up on things. When asking about what work she might be missing, here is a response I got from one of the teachers:

"...Teen Diva has plenty of time to raise her grade before the end of the semester, but she will need to focus better in class. She spends a great deal of time texting and checking her phone. I believe that she could easily complete the assignments in this class, but she seems preoccupied with other matters. I accept late work if it is turned in the day after it was due- but not past that unless there was an illness involved.

Let me know if you have any suggestions- I’m open to any recommendations you might be able to offer!"

Well, first, there is a policy where the teachers are supposed to take cell phones & have parents pick up the phone if caught texting in class. DUH! So that was our "suggestion" to this teacher - actually enforce the policy! DUH!

Well, lo & behold, when I picked up Teen Diva from school,she was complaining that this particular teacher had, indeed, taken her phone & the office was already closed. So she was hoping I'd get it for her the next day (yesterday).

I had a busy day hanging with the neighborhood & really didn't want to go over to the school since she had to be picked up later anyway, PLUS I had to go back over for a meeting that night. Too many trips.

Well, I got a whiney call from her wondering when I was coming to get the phone. I explained that I was waiting for her father to get home so he & I could run some errands a day early since Friday shaped up to be different that usual. Thursdays are "early" days at her school, but she had practice a little later & decided to stay through the down time. I said I couldn't promise coming to get the phone in time & she just needed to know that. But she was still begging for me to come up AND bring her charger!

She was still hoping I'd go get it & take it to her in the library at the school. Folks, this is a big school. I don't know where anything is except the attendance office & main office on my own. Either way, she was staying & I asked her what she planned to do during the down time. She offered up finishing homework & reading her overdue books. Good Idea! But she's pretty social & I knew that probably wasn't happening. Because she forgets we don't sit around all day hoping to do something for her at the very moment she asks. She does get reminded that there is a whole other world out there beyond just her.

Well, I got myself together & decided to go get the phone anyway. Simmer down, it's not "giving in" it's "parenting strategy". Here's how:

I went up to the school, had to go into the main office to pick up & sign out the phone. As I walked out, I looked straight down a hall --- right into the library! Hmmm - do I or don't I? I did! I walked down into a very crowded library! Dang it! So, I did a quick scan & found Teen Diva, sitting on a ledge, chatting with friends. In general, this is fine, but she was supposed to be at a table reading & doing homework. Remember?

So I walked over & approached her all stealth-like. She jumped when she realized I was totally Ninja-Mom, and I handed her the phone. As I handed it to her, I said, "Nice to see you reading." I turned and walked away & I hear as I walked toward the library exit, "But it's dead!" This prompted me to turn back over my shoulder, still walking out, & giving her a shrug. Keep in mind, it was in front of her friends & a crowded high school library.

That, my friends, is parenting! She still got what she wanted, but on my terms & with an element of cold surprise. Bwha-hahahah!
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Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Nearly Neighborly Eyeful

First, I would like to wish you all a very Happy National Good Neighbor Day! You know I love my neighbors! And I almost was a REALLY good neighbor to some of my real life neighbors. And it would have been embarrassing - for me anyway.

My day yesterday was a little turned upside-down. Slightly Omelette, but it could've been worse. After my kids were a bit difficult as we were preparing for a very full morning of getting a new furnace & air conditioner, I didn't exactly have the time I had hoped to sneak in to get cleaned up. It was just the heating & air guys, so who cares! And by the time they were done, it was time to get ready to get the kids home from school.

So, today I was SO happy to be able to get into the shower! I had to have my coffee, Nutella & neighbor time first, though. So I was preparing & could hear the the stupid mail truck for blocks, so I figured I could get cleaned up & shaved (I wouldn't want to be accused of trying to stab someone if they got next to me) before I checked the mail.

So, I got cleaned & smoothed, then checked to see if Hubsy had come home for lunch yet. He hadn't, so I started to go out to get the mail, since I didn't hear the truck anymore. I went to open the front door to head out there when I looked down & realized ----- I was still wrapped in my towel!

My, my! That would have made some of the neighbors happy, I'm sure. Probably not-so-much to others. Super embarrassing for me. But - I bet if the crusty, grumpy mailman had come around at that time, he may not have been so grumpy anymore.

Luckily it was averted. Not exactly the "Good Neighbor" gesture I had in mind.
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Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Double Belt "Fashion"

If you are following my mommy-fashion advice, then you know I've only given one tip so far. So what can we pair with the new Mom Jeans? Read on.

The other day, I had a certain outfit on for one event, then came home & changed to something else. I left on my same jeans for both outfits. (My new bootcut jeans, not my work-in-progress mom jeans.) In transfer of outfits, I did something by accident that I felt like such a dork about! And? I didn't realize until later in the day when I used the restroom. That's when I discovered what I did:

I double-belted. Not even in the fun 80's style of several dangly belts on purpose; I'm talking a belt to hold up my pants & an accessory belt! But it's not as bad as it sounds! I swear!

As a mommy, I do still have what I call my "mommy-hips". Jeans & pants seem to fit this kind of hips differently. So, I do end up wearing a belt sometimes. But I also am a bit modest & will wear longer tops to help cover this physical attribute. Sometimes it's a tunic, mini dress as a tunic, long sweater, etc. Sometimes, these tops need a little umph, so I add a belt, of sorts, to help accentuate/create the illusion of a waist. I'm not big, just a self-conscious thing.

Well, on the day that I am speaking of, I realized that I had the belt on to keep up my pants, a longer shirt (not even a tunic this time), and a really cool belt over. However, if my top scooted up a little bit, you would have seen my amazing-crazy fashion goof! The fashion police would have arrested me right then & there!

Now let's keep this in mind: I (choose to) believe that this goof was genius!

Think about! As long as you wear a tunic of sorts over the top of your jeans, wear the belt THROUGH the loops to keep the pants over your mommy hips, and then the cute decorative belt OVER the tunic for your pop!

And? You can totally pull this off when you wear your Mom Jeans, too.

You're Welcome.
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Friday, September 23, 2011

Omelette Friday

Really? Of course this is how my Fridays have been going lately!

If you have read my 1st Omelette post or my 2nd Omelette post, you now have an idea about how this one will be going.

Fridays are a day when some necessary shopping gets done & I can partake in other things as I enjoy my day with Hubsy. *wink, wink*

Well, we've had very omelette-like Fridays lately, so this would be our first "back to 'normal'" Friday since school started. Right?

Well, I was getting ready for the store, making the list, etc., and got cleaned up, but had the notion to "switch things up a bit". *wink, wink* Hubsy did point out that he wondered if the day would now be thrown off. Whatever.

Well, we decided to check out a store or two after lunching & before heading to the store. That's when it started going haywire:

Teen Diva (you knew she had to be coming into this somewhere) had not made up her mind about going to an event this weekend which she would need tickets for. As we were planning our weekend, I thought I'd text her to see if she'd thought about it for sure. She texted back that she was "going to ask me earlier" if I could bring some $$ to her so she could get a ticket. REALLY? Not sure when she expected to tell me! When it would be too late & then we'd have to hear her tantrum about it? After making her feel bad about it & saying we were already out doing stuff & not sure I could get to her, she sent the whiniest text back (I could hear it, trust me).

In the meantime, hubsy was invited to play golf with a couple of guys that we were just having a conversation about. Well, it would work out for him to go play golf if I went & to give Teen Diva the $$ for her ticket. We would just wait on having food in the house.

That's what we decided to do. And (bad mommy) the only reason I decided to give into Teen Diva was because that meant we could go shopping for it. Mama loves a good shopping trip!

So hubsy & I enjoyed our morning (out of order, of course) then went & enjoyed a nice lunch, then went "window shopping", then came home so he could golf & I could "prep for a shopping trip". (Yes, that's what I'm choosing to call it.) We will have to go grocery shopping at some point, too. We will just have to take Teen Diva, Woogie & Bossyhead with us, too. D'oh! Forgot about that part!

So, my Friday really was scrambled, filled, fried & flipped for sure! Omelette, anyone?
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Thursday, September 22, 2011

Woogie is our Walton

I tend to post a lot about Teen Diva & Bossyhead. They tend to tear our world up the most in the wildest of ways sometimes. But I started realizing that I don't blog about Woogie too much. Usually just a quick little blurb in a Facebook post. So this one is for Woogie!

Woogie is our middle schooler. He is very smart (and I'm not just saying because I'm the mama). He had some medical issues as a baby & has fought through some appearance things. He was so adorable as a tot with a slight speech impediment. As he was getting into awkwardly aging years, there was some bullying going on with him. It has been heartbreaking.

Believe it or not, Woogie is a good kid despite being a teenager. He's not enjoying the transitions going on within him at all. And he doesn't like the way he ends up acting sometimes & he wears his heart on his sleeve. With Woogie, it's all or nothing!

Now because of some of what he has been through growing up, he tends to block things out around him. He is our oblivious child. He can start a conversation with you, no matter what is going on around - even if you are in a conversation with someone else. He tells you all kinds of things he thinks you need to know - even if you don't want to know. He has a vast knowledge of many things and tends to begin a conversation with you in the middle of the thought process already going in his Energizer-bunny-type brain. And, he speaks very loudly. Often.

His ability to talk to anyone at great length about anything at anytime is a blessing and a curse. Bless his heart.

And since he does have such a big heart, he cares what others think - usually. He has a big heart for others & a very charitable heart. He always has. And it's because of this, he is our John-Boy. (reference for those who ever watched the Waltons).

Woogie can't leave the house or go to bed without covering every person at least twice. We literally get this pretty much every morning:
"Bye guys. See you later. Have good days. Tell Bossyhead bye for me. We will see you after school. Hope you have a good days. I love you & see you guys later. Bye."

Or when it's time to go to bed:
"Good night guys. Have a good night. Sweet dreams. I told Teen Diva good night. I shut up the dog for the night. I brushed my teeth. I'm going to tell Bossyhead good night & tell him sweet dreams. So sleep good guys. I love you. Good night."

I wish I were exaggerating about the Walton-ness of Woogie, but I'm not. Hubsy & I laugh to ourselves about it often. Hubsy has even tried to throw Woogie off guard by doing it back, but the obliviousness of Woogie sets in, and he doesn't get it.

And if you missed why he's called "Woogie", it a mash-up of Wikipedia & Google with a touch of a Star Wars reference. That would be my kid. He can be annoying, but he's a good kid that we are proud of.

So, I hope you liked the post. I hope you read more. Hope it gave you a good snicker. I will see you later. I will check in later. See you soon. Bye.
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Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Bossyhead's Cheeky Greeting & Mean Shadow

You may have guessed as to how Bossyhead received his name. And he lives up to it! It's no different in the mornings either. He wants to take over the morning like the whole world is going to wait for him when he's ready.

If you are one of my Facebook or Twitterhood neighbors, you may have seen the name that Bossyhead named his hiney. If you missed it, a few mornings ago he referred to his rear end as his "cheeky buddies". I really did want to be mortified, but I was so caught off guard, I just started giggling. So imagine when I'm trying to wake him up this morning. No different than usual really, just being a booger getting around. I left his room for a moment & came back to get him just to see Bossyhead's Cheeky Buddies in the air, facing the doorway where I'm standing, with his thumbs at his hips with fingers spread open. His hands were twisting front-to-back while Cheeky Buddies were swaying back-&-forth. That's right - Bossyhead's Cheeky Buddies greeted me with a "na-na-na-boo-boo". Awesome.

Then, when I FINALLY got him around, fed, dressed, teeth brushed, hair done, jacket on, backpack ready & on with lunch in hand, we headed to the bus stop. While waiting on the bus, Bossyhead likes to pull out another friend of his who is really mean! His shadow! His shadow is a bully & likes to try to beat up mommy's shadow. Bossyhead has a Shadow Bully. I tell him to control his Shadow Bully, but he seems quite amused to unleash it - on me.

I know what you're thinking right now. You are super jealous of my mornings!
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Monday, September 19, 2011

Why I Feel This Way About the Mailman

In my 1st post about the mailman, and my 2nd post, you should have an idea how I feel about the mailman. After the 2nd post, I now have proof!

I want you to look at this picture:



Do you see the size difference in these boxes? It's pretty obvious, I think.

In my last post about a particular "delivery" that the mailman "refused" to deliver & I had to pick it up or schedule a delivery is the small white box - my free perfume sample.

The brown box contained a Jell-O mold I ordered. I found it INSIDE my mailbox today.

So, to make things even more clear, here are the box size differences for you again:



I despise my mailman. Retire already, dude!
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Doormat Duties Reveal Weird Things

I just got back from completing my second week of "doormat duty". And I've been informed that my "sucker duty" will be increasing through the weeks. I think my DOORMAT shirt & SUCKER hat must glow in the dark, too.

So I went in early today to find out that I need to help this other chick make copies so I can get on with what I'm supposed to be doing. This is fine. I have a lot of experience in administrative work, and I did this doormat duty last year, so no big deal. But - this gal I helped had her own crazy system that did NOT meld with mine! I think she was actually more disorganized than me. That's not giving a lot of credit. And I still had my portion of the stuff done & ready before her. *bang head on table* All while she stood looking over my shoulder. We will have to see how this plays out.

On top of that, I rather enjoyed listening to this counterpart going on about how Facebook is a giant time-suck & how she only gets on every couple of months to share pics of kiddos, and about how there is no need to share every detail of their lives all over -- the -- internet -- ummm -- OOPS! Well, here I am. Possibly making an arch nemesis. Once again, we will have to see how this plays out.

When I got my stuff done for what I needed, I had a child come out of Bossyhead's class that is SO funny! Last week, Little Spy told me that Bossyhead brought a toy in his bag that he didn't think should be there. Today, Little Spy told me that he looked in Bossyhead's bag & found -- *big breath in* -- nothing. Little Spy seemed so disappointed that he couldn't bust Bossyhead. Which is so funny since they were such good buddies last year. Kids are funny!

So, that's been my Monday so far. I know - you're jealous.
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Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Gave Me Giggles

To all my "stay-at-home-moms". I found this looking for something else, and just had to share this. Just because it made me laugh. Here you go:

How to be a 1950's Housewife - from www.ehow.com

Do you dream of a time in the 1950's when rock and roll was just coming on the scene and every girls dream was of her wedding? Well here are a few tips if you want to relive that period of time as the fantasy housewife.

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Things You'll Need
Lot's of energy.
No opinion.
Talent in every area.


Instructions

Things You'll Need
Lot's of energy.
No opinion.
Talent in every area.

1
As a housewife of the 1950's you won't be required to hold a job outside the home. In fact you really won't be allowed to because it would be an insult to the male of the family for not being able to provide for his wife and family! So relax and buy a box of bonbon' s.

2
Always wake at least two hours before your husband so you can shower, do your hair, put on make up and a really nice dress and high heels. You must always look your best when he see' s you first thing in the morning and never, ever have morning breath or look sleepy.

3
Next cook a nourishing breakfast for the whole family. Stuff them with eggs, beacon, biscuits made from scratch, gravy, milk, orange juice and don't forget the perfect jams and jellies you canned all by yourself during the dog days of summer. Stuff them until they can't move and are sure to gain enough weight to be a battle ship in dry dock.

4
Be sure when they are getting ready for work and their school day you have clean clothes out for everyone. Do not make them choose their own outfit. Silly woman, that's you job! Always make sure they are wearing the latest up to date styles so everyone will think they are keen.

5
Be sure you pack a good lunch for them. For the kid's pack a good sandwich, chips, carrot sticks, cupcakes, fruit, a thermos of milk and a thermos of hot soup! Don't forget the note with words of love and support.

6
Now it's time for you! First refresh your makeup and hair. Then start with cleaning the kitchen from top to bottom. Don't worry if the floors look clean enough because it's still best to clean them again so your family can make you eat off of them and not worry about your health.

7
Now for all the laundry you must gather from each room in the house and start washing. Never day them in a dryer. That is a waste of money when you can spend time hanging them on an outside line for the fresh air scent. When they are finished drying you will bring them in, sprinkle them with a little water and roll them in a tight ball so you can iron it all the next day. Make sure to keep it all in the laundry room out of sight of the husband and kid's. They deserve a relaxed life.

8
Next pick up the living room, bedroom, and all other rooms in the house. Dust everything within an inch of it's life and vacuum all floors. Now clean the bathroom and scrub every surface for the fresh clean smell. You would never want your family to see anything disgusting in your bathroom and you really don't want the neighbors to inspect your work when they come to visit.

9
Well, it's time for a break. Make yourself a light lunch of salad, no dressing and an apple. Don't want to lose the figure you had the day you got married. You know, when you were 18 years old, 2 less kids, one less husband and 20 less years! While you are eating you can watch your favorite soap opera while darning the socks of the whole family or creating lovely clothes by hand or polishing all the stainless steel you own. Never let the grass grow under your pretty high heels! Be productive while relaxing.

10
The kids will be home from school soon so you must make sure you have made a batch of home made cookies with plenty of butter and sugar. A big glass of chocolate milk and their favorite TV shows while they do their homework.
You will be making dessert for tonight, putting the dinner to cook of ham, fresh peeled and mashed potatoes, fresh green beans with bacon, more biscuits and lots of butter!

11
Now all you have to do before hubby gets home from work is set the table, clean the rooms again, make the kids clean up and look cute as pie, refresh yourself with a new dress and different shoes. Evening hair do, nice makeup, a happy smile and NO complaints about anything.

12
As he walks in the door you hand him the paper, his favorite drink, ask how his day went and then leave him alone for 30 minutes while you finish dinner, get it on the table and quietly announce it's time to eat.
After he and the kids finish dinner you clear the table, wash all the dishes by hand, dry them and put them away, clean the kitchen again and look perky!

13
The family watches TV together or plays a game, eats more dessert and then wanders off to bed.
Now it's time for you to go to the bedroom, turn down the covers, fluff the pillows, take a quick shower and put on a pretty nightie, put on fresh makeup, do your hair again down this time and call for hubby to come to bed. You read while he relaxes and when he is ready for a little fun you will be just as ready and excited he is giving you his time. Oh,oh...he is tired now and finished. He rolls over, goes to sleep and you slip away to the bathroom to put on fresh makeup in case he wakes in the middle of the night and sees your face. You must always look your very best!

14
Ahhh... peace at last. Now for the well deserved 4 hours of sleep before you do it all over again.
Tomorrow is ironing day, baking bread day, going to the store day for anything the family wants and you will do it all as the lovely, skinny bride you were 20 years ago and with a smile on your pretty little face. After all you don't have to hold a job and support the family.
Where are those bonbon' s?


Tips & Warnings

If you are woman enough to do all this without complaint then more power to you.

Buy dollar store makeup because you are going to go through a lot of it.

Beware of homicidal thoughts and fantasies.



Read more: How to be a 1950's Housewife | eHow.com


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Thursday, September 8, 2011

Oops She Did it Again

If you were already one of my neighbors about a week ago, you will remember I brought up in a status about Teen Diva setting her alarm for once, but sleeping through it because she was asleep on her floor on the other side of the bed.

'And in shocking news: Teen Diva actually set her alarm last night! Not so shocking news: she was sleeping through it...on the floor...on the opposite side of the bed. I'm concerned that may have been the wrong side of the bed. Good morning, to me. Need that coffee - and a small investment in Via.
September 1 at 5:44am'

OK, so she forgets to set her alarm & I have to get her anyway. Well, imagine my surprise when I was approaching the bedroom door while hearing her alarm. I did quickly figure out that she wasn't hearing it. When I opened the door, it was like deja vu.

I opened her bedroom door to see that her bed was empty & she was responding to me from, you guessed it - the floor, on the opposite side of the bed!

Now she doesn't usually set her alarm. I am the alarm that makes sure she actually gets out of bed, too. And, she is usually IN her bed. So I don't know what it is about setting your alarm & then going to sleep on the floor nearly as far away from the clock as possible, but I think she's defeating her own purpose.

Either way you look at it, I come to get her anyway.
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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Oh No He Didn't


OK, many of you know how I feel about the mailman. If not, you need to read the previous post concerning this to fully understand.

Yesterday, I could hear the truck throughout the neighborhood, because it's obviously not fixed yet. He was going extra slow yesterday, but whatever. I went out to get the mail, and I found a little form from the post office stating that they had tried twice to deliver a parcel to me, but since no one was here to receive it, I could either to the post office to get it or fill out the form to tell them when to deliver it. Well I certainly did not want to deal with the mailman, so I decided to pick it up at the post office. I was picking up Teen Diva from school anyway & the post office is right by her school - so it was really convenient to just pick it up myself.

I was baffled as to what it might be though. I had received a package not long ago that had a second parcel that was supposed to come with it. I had contacted the company sending me my stuff that I didn't get all of it, so I found a replacement (?) on my front porch - sent through the mail, mind you. (see the other blog post to know how that goes) So that is why I was so baffled that they couldn't deliver whatever it might be!

I picked up Teen Diva & went over. We waited in a long line to find out what it was. My only guess is it was the missing parcel from the 1st delivery. Imagine my shock when I finally got to a cashier & to see what she brought out to me...

This woman brought out a box - a white box - a white box that could hold a CD or DVD. Seriously. Now, I was even more baffled. Then I got thinking - I sent off for a free sample of a Burberry scent, but certainly this wasn't it - couldn't be!

A few months ago, I sent off for a Jell-O mold & it was crammed into our mailbox. Our mailman puts also puts the mailed boxes of checks in there, so this box given to me would have fit in the mailbox.

So, I am trying to figure out, for the life of me, why this guy couldn't put a freaking PERFUME SAMPLE in the mailbox.

That's right. I went to the post office to pick up a free perfume sample. A PERFUME SAMPLE! Teen Diva couldn't believe it either. I was inconvenienced because this guy refused to put a smaller box than a Jell-O mold into the mailbox - twice. And I didn't even know about it those times. The form was my breaking news.

I know I've said it before, but if the post office is about ready to shut down operations, wouldn't they try anything to keep things going? Like maybe starting with overall customer service? Since things have gone all "digitized" in that department, the postal employees have cared so much less.

So, any thoughts on what I can do to this crusty, grumpy, old mailman? He's willing to walk up to the front door to drop things on our porch, but won't leave my free sample in the mailbox? Because I am sensing a disgruntled employee who needs to retire soon...very, very soon.

On a brighter note, Teen Diva & I smelled really good on the way home. She said we smelled expensive. HA!
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Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Redefining the Mom Jean


Woogie has a really bad habit of not cleaning out his pockets before putting pants in the laundry. I would generally think about emptying them, but he keeps his laundry in his room for long periods of time; by the time I get laundry from him, I'm so excited that he is going to wear clean clothes that I forget about the pockets.

Woogie likes to keep pens & pencils mostly in his pockets. Well, I discovered, in the dryer, pens & parts as well as mechanical pencils & filler lead falling out of the front of the dryer when I opened the door. The pen & parts were of the black ink sort. So I frantically started pulling out this large load of laundry to see how much of it was ruined! The only marks on anything I found were a few red marker-like dots on a pair of Teen Divas shorts (she needs to get rid of them anyway) & a couple of the same mark types on a pair of pants of mine that I REALLY like. Then, when all of the clothing items were removed, there it was...the red pen. It marked up the inside of the dryer a little, but it turned out to be a miracle load of laundry!

So I got thinking, which can be scary sometimes, but here goes: as a mom, we tend to get spills & stains of all sorts on our pants. We work hard to get out or cover up the bleach drips, ketchup or mustard drops, blood streaks from wounds (or otherwise), grass stains, pen marks, dirt, spit up, wine, mystery marks, etc. But stop to think why we try. They should be like our war wounds of what we go through. Screw trying to get them out! Set those suckers in & show the world what we do.

So, this is my proposal for the new Mom Jean: have the stains & distress already in them as they continue to be a work in progress. They are a canvas of mommy art & still fashionable. Forget the high-waisted, tapered things that carry the name now. Let's work to reinvent them! And just add glitter (if it isn't already spilled on it from a craft) with wine stains to become your cocktail mom jeans. Add a pretty blouse or sweater & heels for the adult night out.

Who's on board? Work it, girl!
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What Has Happened to Me?


I became a S@HM for the 3rd time over two years ago. In between, I had a working life.

When I was at a J.O.B., I found that my holiday or wish lists included things to look good for work, things that would help me through the day, gift cards that I could get that stuff myself, etc. But lately I began to realize these wants have changed.

I have started baking more in the last year. I realized that I wanted several things for that: baking pans, utensils, major mixers, etc. Trust me, 5 years ago, this never would have crossed my mind!

Also, a few days ago, we had some chicken thawed out for hubsy to grill. The one day that fit in our schedule for him to grill, he didn't feel like it. I can count on 1 hand how many times I have ever fixed chicken. Seriously. Usually that's a thing hubsy works with. Well, we had to use the chicken. I know many are pulling out the crock pots again, so I decided to do the same. You know - "lazy cooking". I threw in some seasoning stuff that hubsy would have used for grilling into the crock pot with the chicken. Very happy with how it came out & I didn't have to worry about burning it. So, since our crock pot was one of our wedding gifts, which was before timers were being put on them, I find myself wanting to do more lazy cooking & get an updated crock pot.

Really? A mixer? A crock pot? What is happening to me? Just the other day, hubsy took Woogie & Bossyhead to the driving range while Teen Diva stayed home to break into some sewing & I stayed around to bake. Uh - what stereo types did we just become? I think I'm more bothered that I was OK with it!

I have read articles around gift-giving holidays that there are certain gifts you should NEVER give a woman. One of the things pointed out happened to be kitchen appliances, even if she asks for it. Two years ago, or before, I would have completely agreed with it! However, if I ask for this stuff - I really do want it! I would be so overjoyed by getting a new big mixer or a fancy lazy cooker!

Trust me. If any family members ever read this, they would be taking me to a hospital or checking me into a psyche ward. Luckily, this is my time away from them, so I can look & feel pathetic to my neighbors.

So, you can get me a new coffee pot, too.
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Monday, September 5, 2011

Omelette Day: The Hectic, The Good, The Bad AND Ugly

Originally, my only obligation for Labor Day was helping out with my goddaughter's 16th birthday. It was happening in my hometown. All of our family also live in my hometown, so once they caught wind of needing to be out there, they started bookending the day quickly. So, if you saw my recent Omelette Week post, imagine it happening within a day.

I got some baking done for the birthday party, but it turned out I burned some of it. Ugh. By the time I figured it out, I needed to go to bed. So I had to redo some of the baking first thing this morning by getting up early. Ugh. I was finishing some laundry, too. I was going like crazy for over 3 hours before I even got to get cleaned up. By then, I had about 45 minutes to get cleaned up & completely ready to begin our day. Teen Diva wasn't fairing so well as she wasted her time. Bossyhead needed cleaned up & tried to worm his way out of it - I won that round. Woogie just went with the flow, luckily. Hubsy decided to leave the premisses while all of this was going on - not a help.

We did make it out the door to go meet my family at a restaurant for lunch & surprise my grandmother. That was a nice visit & we had a great server. Then onto the next part of the day: the birthday party.

Teen Diva & I went to the party. It was great fun, plus I got to hang out with my childhood best friend & her family. We are a big bunch of dorks who can whoop it up with or without help (like wine). We only drank lemonade with the teenagers there, and I think we had more fun dancing & such than they did. What a great time! Then came dinner with the inlaws.

I want to make it clear that I love my inlaws - I really, REALLY do. But it's hard to defend that & show it after this evening. Last weekend, when they were over at our place, we fixed them enchiladas. So when they took the back bookend of the day, they wanted to feed us, too. They hoped for some grilling time, but decided last minute to fix...enchiladas. Plus they were going to invite a whole group of people. This is not a big deal, but stick with me.

My brother inlaw has this one friend who I do not approve of. He is morally screwed up & just not right. He can convince people to do things, but not me. When he comes, guess who leaves the room if possible? *raises hand* I was not informed he was going to be there, and I never want him around my kids - EVER! Well, while Teen Diva & I were whooping it up, the boys were going to go get haircuts. My MIL said that one of the girls coming by does hair & was going to check to see if she could come out early to help out. Well, after all the hair was cut (not happy with Woogie's), we all gathered around to start eating.

As we sat down, in through the back door entered Unwanted. They all know my feelings for this guy. My sister inlaw feels the same way I do & won't let him near her kids either. That should be a hint. Well, I noticed he sat with my kids & the haircutter, then realized he shared a seat with her. I later asked who the girl actually was. As it turns out, she is one of the infidelities of Unwanted. I was angry with my inlaws for making this OK since they know my feelings about Unwanted, but my hubsy too for allowing all of this to be around & touch my children! I'm not speaking to hubsy - or MIL. Never should've happened. I'm still livid.

Maybe I'm tired, maybe I'm PMSing, but the middle part of the whole day is what I'm clinging to. Oh, and the fact that the inlaws didn't dress as twinkie-twins for the first time in weeks. Thank God!

So, how was your Labor Day?
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Sunday, September 4, 2011

Get a Flow Chart - It's My Fault

I'm not even sure how it happened - but I have an idea:

If you kept up on Facebook with our family visit to 'Hillbilly Fest' (name given by a friend), then you will understand our late afternoon. We didn't stay very long due to the enormous amount of Labor Day weekend crowds there, anyway. Since we were all hungry, we decided to leave to get something to eat.

Hubsy began to poll the kids about eating establishment possibilities. Of course they were all over the board, but a pizza joint & a sub sandwich place seemed to be the front runners. Bossyhead was loudly hoping for the sub sandwich place, but the vote (apparently) rested with me. I was hungry & it didn't matter what we had. However, one did win out - pizza sounded better to me than the subs. So, pizza it was!

When we got into the restaurant, it was obvious how cold it was. I figured we would all warm up a bit when we got our food, but it was SERIOUSLY cold! And it didn't help that our food took a LONG time to get to us. Teen Diva was already mad that we didn't just pick up some fast food since she didn't want to wait at all. Oops.

As we waited...a long...LONG time, Bossyhead started reiterating how cold it was, figured that if we went to the sub shop, then we wouldn't be cold. He then decided that since the final vote was mine, it was all MY fault he was cold at that moment.

Yes indeed, too smart for is own 6-year-old good.

The food was good, and we all survived.

Did you need that flow chart?
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Friday, September 2, 2011

Only a Liquor Tease

Some of you may have seen not too long ago that I am helping clean out my grandmother's house. I have been having a difficult time with it, and, knowing she doesn't drink or smoke or anything, I joked about hoping to find some wine in her house. Ha. Ha.

Went back to help out some more today. I was told to clean out another cabinet, and then - I saw it!

I began jumping up and down when I saw the bottom of a bottle that resembled a wine bottle, if you asked me. I pulled it out in excitement & shock! First, the thought that I'd found a wine bottle WITH liquid in it inside my grandmother's house was just a shock to me. Second, I had deliberately blown off the fact I would ever find liquor of any sort inside that house.

Upon further inspection by hubsy, it was discovered that it was an unopened bottle of...

...


...

...

...sparkling grape juice. Crappola!

I so need a glass of wine after that psyche-out.
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It's Eff Off Friday

Well, neighbors - it's another Eff Off Friday! And I am going to share a couple of them today.

1. Getting Old
This is a rite of passage & earn being able to say things without anyone telling you that you can't, and when people look to you for your wisdom. It also brings forth so many ailments, it makes me sad. When the focus is on which of your friends have gone to the hospital or died, it gets me. When a group of you get together to complain about the younger generation who is different than you, it's disheartening. I want to live a good, long life - but when I come into contact with this, especially several times in the same week, it makes me rethink it.

2. Creepy Guy
I take pride in my hair. No matter how I wear it, it's a "trademark" of sorts. I'm kind of a hair goddess in a weird way. So I do get complimented on it a lot - then that makes me feel good. And I know I've done OK with it when a get a compliment from a gay guy. Those are my favorites! Now let me take you to standing in the check-out line at Walgreen's yesterday: there was this guy in front of me, about my age; he was fairly nice looking, tall, dark, well dressed in his polo & slacks, along with a little bluetooth earpiece in his ear. I thought he'd glanced back at me a couple of times, and then he said it - "I really love your hair." I thanked him for the kind words - and then it got weird quickly. He said he glanced back & thought he was looking at an old movie poster of the woman who's flexing her muscle. My hair was reminicent of Rosie the Riviter so I knew who he was talking about. When I brought up Rosie, he continued,"Yeah! That's who. When my wife & I have kids, and if we have a girl, we are going to hang that poster in the nursery. Wasn't she some kind of pin-up girl?" Yeah - I have no idea what had just happened there either, but I informed him it was about women in the workforce, and he cut me off, "Oh, right, back in World War II." In my house, he is what we refer to as a "creeper". I ignored him after that since he was up at the cashier at that point & I didn't want to hear anymore.



So, to getting old & the creeper guy this week: Eff Off!



I think I feel a little better now.
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Thursday, September 1, 2011

I Wore a Bra and Hat For This

If you read my previous post about taking Bossyhead to school, then you know how that tends to go.

He asked me to be a car rider again today. I have not yet cleaned my car, so the chances of things falling out onto someone else's feet are very high. Plus I have some boxes in there too - momentarily. That would block him from getting out on the side they want him to, and I am not moving his booster seat to the other side. So this was going to be entertaining. And I would need to at least wear a hat. Trust me.

As I fretted over the thought of the messy car back in the kiddie drive-thru, Bossyhead tells me there's no need to go through that line. I was confused, but relieved. Then he told me it because he wants me to go into his classroom. WHAT?? Oh, man! That means I actually have to put on a bra & get dressed, AS WELL AS wear a hat. But I had to talk to his teacher anyway about an upcoming "event" we will be unable to attend due to another appointment on the books & priorities.

So I got myself together, helped get Bossyhead together, and took him to school. I will have to admit that walking past the kiddie drive-thru gave me a small sense of relief. And then we walked in.

I spoke to his teacher about the event we would not be at, so she gave me some information about what was going to be covered. She then said that one of the topics was about volunteers & cornered me into volunteering...every week...on Monday mornings. Are you kidding? Talk about feeling blindsided.

I almost felt like Bossyhead & his teacher were in cahoots. That's what I wore a bra & hat for today. Do you think that if I'd left my pajamas on, no bra & crazy bed hair alone, they may have had second thoughts on that volunteering thing?

Something tells me that I will have to put my foot down on Bossyhead being a car rider anymore. The bus is fine transportation.
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