DOORMAT Duties Can Be OK

So, it's Monday. Most of you know that means one thing for sure: DOORMAT Duties! And a thing that goes along with this weekly occurrence is trying to get victory over my arch nemesis, DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh! So here's how it went down today.

Instead of being asked to help DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh with her crazy copying methods (she beat me in there today), I was asked to make other copies. Good! However, I had to set her straight on how many of HER copies I actually needed since we were always coming up short. So I made sure mine would be COVERED! Funny: only one pile of copies was set up in the way I showed her. And she was still using the machinery wrong. But I dealt with it as I was slightly defeated this week - but still got a bit of victory at the same time.

I will let you in on what I mostly do with my DOORMAT duties when I go in on Mondays. I try to help 1st graders become better readers. That's right - a bring 22 kids out of the classroom, one at a time, to check their reading fluency & record it. DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh relies on stickers to give the kids - sadly I think it's because she has a scary & in-your-face personality. I just get the kids excited about it. And the kids love to show me how well they can read this week!

Now besides DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh, there's also an experienced grandmother who comes to help out, too. I get the feeling that Granny is also tired of DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh & her antics. But I noticed that the school has a few park-type benches in the hallways, but DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh & Granny already had the 2 benches in our hallway. So I just camped out & set up my station on the floor outside Bossyhead's classroom. Well - I got an accommodations upgrade today! Was it a park-type bench? Nope! I am now getting to use a makeshift classroom down the hallway! OK, stick with me on this one - it's in a glorified janitor's closet. Really - but they set up an area for a tutoring or help area. There's a nice u-shaped table & chairs - and they are nice! They sit upon a really cute little school rug. And it was offered to ME! Bwah-hahahaha!!

The kids seemed to do much better over all, too. And It's my place for a couple of hours! And those kids are funny! I wished it was a room that had one of those 'Kids Say the Darndest Things' kind of camera. I was asking them about their Halloween & if they ate all their candy. They were cracking me up! It was actually a bit of a bright spot.

And now an inspirational moment: There is a kindergardener at Bossyhead's school who has Down's Syndrome & needs a lot of help. But she is so sweet & so adorable. She loves seeing me on Mondays & saying hi. I always have something in my hair - generally a flower of sorts. She always loves my flowers & has to point them out. I got to see her twice today & she couldn't wait to say hi to me both times. It warms my heart. So I want to make it known that I love people with Down's Syndrome. They have an innocence on life & know nothing but love. All that I have met & known have been so full of life & love. If I EVER hear of someone making fun of one or any of them - I will go white-girl crazy on you & may punch someone in the face. That is your warning. We all can learn from these people with a condition they cannot help. We all need their beautiful spirits.

That was my day! The best DOORMAT duty day so far! It makes me OK with dealing with the craziness of DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh!
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I Love My Family, I Love My Family, I Love My Fam...(and a Personal Victory)

So let me take a moment to share some of my chaos lately. And it is chaotic - so grab a drink & sit back.

Last weekend, Bossyhead had a soccer game about 30 minutes away. It was in a neighboring community of my hometown. My hometown is where ALL of our immediate family lives. So they were thrilled that they didn't have to make the weekly 30 minute drive themselves. AND - when they find out we are heading out their direction - EVERYONE wants to see us! It becomes a long day.

Well, it was on a Sunday. We had church, then we got to eat lunch & find enough time to get ourselves ready for the game. We head out to the game and have to deal with MIL getting lost, so BIL had to drive her. So another family member. But, remember - I like him. Just don't tell him, it might go to his head. My folks were there, too. Well, after the soccer game, we were invited to go over my parents' house to take in the late afternoon football game on TV. So we agreed, then left a little early after our team put a whomping on our rivals! So we headed over to see my homebound grandmother for a little bit. That's hard to deal with sometimes, but it was a good visit & needed to happen. But we couldn't stay long since we needed to go over & see the inlaws. I was not looking forward to this visit. Because MIL had been dying for us to come over for weeks to show off their remote control Santa they got from their garage saleing. Well, we saw it. All hubsy & I could do was just shake our heads. MIL was over-giddy about it. And keep in mind that they have kept that Santa in their kitchen/living room area so we could see it. It's been there for about 3 weeks. Geesh. At this point I had a migraine setting in - any idea why? And then they all forgot & kept yelling at each other to 'come here' & then pull the 'OOPS - I forgot' thing when they realize how bad I hurt. *sigh* Remember? It's Sunday! Now it's a school night - and it IS night by this point. We are still 30 minutes from home & still need to get the kids cleaned up & in bed. Right? WRONG! My inlaws were getting new furniture & so ALL of their living room & dining room furniture were going over to my BIL's. He can't find anyone with a truck on such short notice - so - since hubsy has a truck, guess what that meant! *sigh* So they all load up the furniture to take another 15 minute drive to unload at BIL's. And I hurt. We finally got home late, but got the kids cleaned up & in bed after an overly exhausting day. Turned into a total omelette!

Then, of course the next day is Monday: DOORMAT duties & having to deal with DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh. Well, when I got to Bossyhead's school, they weren't doing what I help with each week since it was a shortened school week. So? No having to deal with DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh! YAY! Wait - short school week? *sigh*

We also dealt with parent-teacher conference (only for Bossyhead) and dealing with Woogie's birthday. I can't be old enough to have a 14 yr old! Not possible! But we'd been trying to figure out how to work having a get-together for his birthday, which is mostly with family. Of course.

Well, Bossyhead had his last game this past weekend, here on our home turf. So the family came out to watch (my mom & dad, , the inlaws, BIL, PLUS hubsy's aunt, uncle & cousin who happen to be in town). Now, when there's a game going of a kid your supporting, I would think you would pay attention. Only hubsy, peeping mom & I were the ones paying attention as needed. EVERYONE else was starting conversations & acted like they were the only ones there. SERIOUSLY! When a game is going & you come up to ask me how the movie way, I will walk away from you. Just for future reference. Oh, and it's not the time to talk about politics, talk horribly about people who are dead, and/or how everything should be about you. Oh, and I know you want to tell the kid you're supporting they are doing a great job, but just because he takes a break on the bench doesn't give you the right to just walk over & start a conversation with them. WAIT UNTIL AFTER THE GAME! That's all I'm saying. And yes, that's what we were dealing with. Oh, and don't put pressure on the kid you're watching to score a goal & make sure the team wins just for YOUR bragging rights.

Then, after the game, we all were going to head over to our house for a cookout to celebrate Woogie's bday. I made a swirl cake, but have no decorating skills for a cake. That's my mom's territory, but Woogie wanted me to do it. Of course. So I had to fake all the baking plus made extra cupcakes, too. I did all the baking BEFORE the game & knew I'd have to decorate while the WHOLE family was there. SURPRISE! This included everyone at the game PLUS: my brother, grandma (yay!), SIL & hubby + girls, and with the addition of Teen Diva's new boyfriend. Whew!

So now I have MIL whining because I didn't make cupcakes SHE wanted! Um - I think she forgets it's not HER party. Then she eventually begins to tell EVERYONE (loudly) about the bachelor & bachelorette parties at strip clubs that hubsy's aunt & uncle went to a year & a half ago AND started talking about stripper names & lap dances. Um - in front of the kids. When we told her to shut up, she just started loudly whispering the rest of her thought. Then when we tell her to shut up AGAIN (reminding her about her grandchildren), she gives it a break for about 2 minutes & starts in on it again. Ugh & ew! Peeping mom is standing around in the kitchen watching my decorating failures & wanting to help. But I can DO this!! So I try & the cake turned out crazy, messy, cool! She admitted she was impressed. And I made my own icing - which mom approves of! YAY! Oh, and MIL & the aunt devoured the 3 leftover pieces of birthday cookie cake that Woogie was hoping to hold onto to have at another time. But they were hungry & couldn't wait for the grilling, so they gobbled it up & MIL wanted to know about licking the beaters from the cake batter. I can't make this stuff up, people. Then Goober (belongs to MIL - the yang to her yang), is all heart but just needs to sit in a corner. He wants to help & is a lot of talkin' about stuff he actually doesn't get. Have I ever mentioned how the inlaws need a 24/7 chaperone or assisted living? Just wondering - it's because they do! Meeting the boyfriend was OK. He seemed nice enough & they were cute together even though he is about 3 of her (she's super petite with a tiny & he was very tall with a bigger frame). But he was prepared to meet the lunatics (because that's how Teen Diva described the whole family - nice). We had to deal with MIL wanting to know when we were doing the cake so she could eat 4 of my cupcakes. Geesh!

When it came time for gifts, Woogie got a few new shirts & a couple of jackets. MIL was just announcing & gushing about how 'pretty' was going to look going back to school on Monday. Ugh. My poor son. And when it was time for all to depart, the inlaws think they are in so good with my grandma. She thinks they are immature & need to grow up! HA!! So do the rest of us.

FINALLY when everyone left, we just had the boyfriend hanging around. His mom brought him was going to pick him up late. That's fine - let's get to know him! But when it came time for him to be picked up - he just left. Teen Diva walked him out, but he said nothing to us. *RED FLAG*

Well, on Sunday, Teen Diva got to sing a little bit of a solo EARLY with the 'old people choir'. Very proud of her! And one of the girls she's having teen drama with had to sit there & watch & listen. HA! Well, during another service (our normal one), Teen Diva got a text message from the boyfriend. Not a good one either. It was a BREAKUP TEXT!! Because he doesn't drive & they wouldn't get to hang out much. WHAT?? For being such a big guy, he was certainly a weenie! But Teen Diva may have another guy in the wings; one she already had a thing for but didn't think she had any chance with. Well, there might be now. I told her to change her focus since this pig isn't worth her hormonal emotions! But, in diva-fashion, I think she's milking it for all it's worth.

*DEEP BREATH IN; DEEP BREATH OUT*

Then yesterday came around - Monday. This would mean? DOORMAT duties (with the SUCKER hat). And I was putting my guard up for DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh! When I showed up, the copies had not even been made yet - so I went to check on them ---- and my arch nemesis had not shown up yet. So - I took the copies & RAN to the copy room. So that meant I was in charge this time!! Eventually, DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh came blowing in like a tumbleweed & I told her what she needed to do & how to do it! Guess what? We were organized & got done faster. Go figure. VICTORY IS MINE!!!

So, also had Halloween - I did extra DOORMAT duties at Bossyhead's school as I got roped into helping with the party. Apparently my 'NO' button was broken when I got asked. But that was fun & I got to take Bossyhead home early! Worked out great! Had to put up Halloween decor for the Trick or Treaters, get my costume on, help the kids with their costumes, set out the candy, eat dinner, and attempt to watch Monday Night Football. What a night!I do love Halloween!

So, my friends, that's what I've been up to. I think you're mostly caught up!
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Be Vewy, Vewy Quiet...

This morning, Bossyhead had gotten up & was laying on the floor watching TV. And I noticed that he was no longer looking at the television. The lower half of his body had not moved, but the upper half was slightly twisted, with his chin on his soccer ball, facing the opposite direction of the TV. He looked dazed, like maybe daydreaming or something.

I asked him if he was doing OK. He only shifted his eyes to me & nodded slightly, then his eyes began staring at the floor again. I kept watching him to see what the deal was.

As I looked closer, I realized he was studying a fly on the carpet. So I asked him if he was looking at the fly. Again, I only received a slight nod. He was doing this in hopes to not scare the fly away.

So, as I watched him, his look slightly changed. He rolled forward on his ball a bit & quickly raised & lowered his arm as to attempt to smash the fly - but to no avail.

I then noticed that the ball had been moved out of the way, he was laid out, on his belly, in commando position, tracking down the fly on the floor again - slowly making his move, quietly slithering closer. A raise of the hand & a quick lowering of the hand proved to be another defeat.

He has given up for now, but I know it will become personal. Those little buggers (pun intended) may not stand a chance against our little nimrod.


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UPDATE: This afternoon - he got one! We are so proud. Carry on.

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Playing With My (Halloween) Food

I'm going make it very known that I LOVE HALLOWEEN!!

If I have the chance to be creative with my food for it, I do it. I try to keep my anonymity around these parts, but I'm going share some of my fun creations & it might give me away to some. That's how it goes. I want to share some fun ideas with you. You can either gawk & be horrified or gander & be amazed! HA!

My favorite is the stuff I use with my brain mold. I have a big one that I have used, and recently received a smaller one that I really want to use! They can be used to make a cheeseball (love doing a cheese brain) or gelatin. We even used the big brain mold for a brain project for Woogie several years ago. He got an 'A' & the class loved the jello brain! Apparently no one had done jello brain for a brain model for the project before. HA! And, for effect - serve on a silver platter. When the cheese brain was done, we brushed a little ketchup over the top for gorier effect.


Another fun one is a zombie face cake! Take several layers of foil & put it over your face or someone else's. Not to smother them - but to make a mold of their face. The several layers of foil help give it stability. Carefully place the foil mold face down (pun slightly intended) in a cake pan. I have one that was completely cut up & bent to hold the face mold. Spray the foil face with cooking spray & then take red velvet cake mix & fill as much as you can. Bake it & use the toothpick test. Sometimes it may bake for a couple of hours. But when you take it out & let it cool, pick that thing up & flip it over in a cake pan or glass dish; peel off the foil & you will be amazed at what you see! Take a blue, black or brown icing pen & make a line over the mouth & eyes. Crush oreos & put it around the face cake & it will look like a zombie face coming out of the ground!


There' also punch you can make. A tomato-juice-based drink that you can add cherry to, or other fruit juices to sweeten it up. take some of the juice & put it in a human heart mold & freeze it. Spray the mold first! You then can have a floating heart in your blood punch. So cool! Serve it in a cauldron! Bwah-hahahaha! (Sorry - no pic of it.)

There's also witch fingers you can make. Take your favorite cookie dough & form cylinders. Begin shaping them into "fingers" & add an almond slice at the tip for a fingernail. Color the dough with green food coloring if you want witch fingers.


Another tomato-juice-based dish you can make is Eyeball Soup. It's red, creamy, hot (simmer down people - hehe), and it has pearl onions in it! I took it a step further & added whole cloves to one end of each onion I put in there. It was wonderfully twisted!


So, there you go. Inside my mind at Halloween time. So much fun. Bone Appetite!
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DOORMAT Victory! (a small one)

What a crazy week, but thought I'd share what happened Monday with my DOORMAT duties!

If you have kept up with these adventures, you know I have an arch nemesis: DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh! She is insane, has no idea what she's doing, and has still gotten to be put in charge of doing the major portion of copies for several 1st grade classes. She is new to the school & believes everyone else is too. She's loud & refuses to listen to ANYONE! So when I don't have my stuff because we are waiting on her, I get the 'privilege' (it's not a right) to be able to help this psycho out. yippee & yay me. (Can you sense the excitement? I knew you could!)

Well, Monday was one of those days. And she was given a more difficult task that she could NOT keep up with! I was trying to help out what she was already making a mess of, adding all kinds of extra steps of work & was only concerned about the math of things rather than keeping it simple & getting the job done. When I tried to give her a couple of tips, she got mad at me & nearly yelled (said REALLY loudly), "WE ALL HAVE OUR OWN METHODS!" Whoa! Simmer down princess. She refused to see that her method doesn't work. The copies were in piles that made no sense & the piles were running together. Do you understand how she gained her name? And in the mess, she had to ask me how to work an actual copier! There are rules on what can & can't be run on a copier and the risograph. She refused to find out until I said something to her. Geesh!

Once we think we have everything together now, and everything is separated per class, the teacher I work with appeared very displeased with the odd pile I gave her. I think she sensed my confusion as well since DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh was the only one with any information & she refused to give it. Once we got things sorted out, it became very apparent that I was short one pile of what I needed. I went to another Doormat helper to see if she had extras in her pile. Alas, she did not. SHE actually was short also. So I had to go to my arch nemesis to see if she had extra. What do you know - she had counted wrong & she had 2 extra. Go figure. But it wasn't enough to go around.

So I had to put on my cape & come to the rescue. I went & made the extra copies needed as the Doormat Helper seemed quite relieved & I got to finish my duties.

It appeared that commotion may have come out of this as I was talking to my real life fabulous crazy neighbor (really do love her). She came into the school & I was trying to see if she knew anything about this villain. She did not, but does crazy-cool detective work! (She's really nosy when she needs to be.) She went to the teacher who DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh works for about the mess. I think the teacher I work for may have done the same thing.

Well, when I was done, I started to leave. But the teacher I worked for got puppy-dog eyes & asked if I would take over on a copy project. Usually I would say no - but not today! I wanted to prove that there is a better way! I got the project done, in order, separated properly & to my go-to teacher in efficient time & it was ready to go. HA-HA-HA! *super hero stance* My job here is done!

Let's see what the next Monday brings & what happens. Let's see if DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh will continue to be trusted - or will have been defeated!

To Be Continued...
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Money, Money, Money - I Hate Fundraising

You mean you brought home ANOTHER fundraiser that we aren't going to do? I know you want the crappy prizes, but we aren't getting crappy stuff!

Anyone else have this thought process or conversation with their kids about school fundraisers? These things are horrible!

I know the school needs money for resources and the like, but there's GOT to be a better way!

And? There are 300 other kids selling the same crap to everyone else, too. Annoying! And? They get prizes for selling enough of the crap! So - if you sell 73.4 items, you get get a pencil topper & fart slime? Awesome. We get to spend $83 to get a crappy plastic ladle & coasters? Great. Worth it? NOT A CHANCE!

I would rather the schools just send out a note saying they need $$$. I will happily just give them $20 or $30 to help out. Seriously.

Now my kids have done the "district fundraiser". EVERY kid from kindergarten through 8th grade was to sell these for "fabulous prizes" (see above paragraph). But all these kids in the district are selling them. We had 2 in our house selling them. They were due today. We didn't buy any. Instead we bribed the boys with $5 each that they could spend on whatever crap prize they want from Wally World or elsewhere & then we didn't have to take a card that we would only use 2 of the 20 things from.

I have a much better fundraising idea! Have a talent show for the faculty. Let the kids advertise for it & then keep a tab of which kids you are there to watch the show for. Most of the faculty have an outside talent that can be shared. However, if one was moonlighting as a pole dancer or drag queen, that might be a little different. But I digress. Most of them have a singing, dancing (appropriate), magic, etc. talent. What kid wouldn't want to know that about their educators! And the parents would love to know who is working with their kids - so show off the talent! The kids would beg to come to this event, it would be entertaining for adults & it wouldn't take a kid asking you to buy 20 things to get a crap prize. Hold a drawing at the event for the kids AND for the adults.

I want to help the schools. They need money. I've seen it first hand from doing DOORMAT duties to see where the money needs to go. But there HAS to be a better way! People are guilting their kids into being seriously pushy sales people. It's frustrating when they get told they need to get pumped up for crappy prizes. If they want prizes, just send some $$ to school in their name & give them happy stickers. I mean really!

Am I the only one who feels this way? Or has anyone else bribed their kids into NOT doing a fundraiser?
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Messin' With Teen Diva

For the parents out there who end up watching the kids' show 'iCarly', you will be familiar with the bit they do called 'Messin' With Lewbert' (insert remote control crowd cheers here). If you don't know what I'm talking about, Carly & her two friends have a web show. They do a bit once in a while that focuses on pranking their horrible doorman at the apartment building. He is pretty nasty - and his name is Lewbert - and he has a nasty, giant wart on his face with a personality to match.

Well, Teen Diva isn't AS bad as Lewbert, but she can get pretty nasty & hateful. She's also fairly gullible & it is SO much fun to mess with! She may learn & become immune to it one of these days - but we will continue to have a lot of fun with it until & if that day ever comes!

If you saw my fantastic parenting in the cell phone blog post, you will know what an issue we can have with Teen Diva & her cell phone. Well, the mean parent struck again with that cell phone. Want to know what I did? Keep reading!

We have a rule about electronics in our house: ALL electronic from the kids (phones, laptops, Nintendo DS', iPods, etc.) MUST be turned in BEFORE they go bed. And they must get permission to retrieve ANY of their electronics. If these are not met, you lose your electronics by discretion. And we do still get them "forgetting" to turn their stuff in & sometimes we get them trying to find a loophole of sorts.

Of course, Teen Diva is a main culprit of this. We hear a lot of excuses as to why things can't be turned in. Usually it's because she "lost" the item in her black hole. She's even snuck her electronics out & tried to tell us that we never gave it back to her from last time, but it's sitting on her bed. Things like that. (a bonus tip: to keep them from sneaking them out during their "grounding", hide electronics in some kind of bag or garment & put it in the trunk of your car. Bwah-hahahaha)

Well, last night, we noticed she never came out of hiding after getting cleaned up. I went to check on her & she was PASSED OUT (almost sleeping beauty-style) on her bed with her phone placed beautifully on her pillow. So - I snuck over to the bed, took the phone, then turned out her light.

Being the "nice mommy", I checked to see if it needed charging. It did, so I plugged in her phone this time, but placed it under an end table while it charged. Apparently she got up at one point & freaked out because she couldn't find her phone.

When I woke her up this morning, I didn't say a word about it. She woke up talking 500 mph about how she looked for her phone & it was right there & she thought she had it & looked everywhere & she doesn't know where it is & blah-blah-blah. She never picked up on the fact that I was really calm about it. I just told her to eat breakfast.

She got done with breakfast early to spend TWENTY MINUTES trying to find her phone in her black hole. I reminded her she needed to get ready for school & to stop looking for the phone. However, in this time, she thought that taking our ONE landline receiver to the black hole to call the "missing" phone was a good idea - even though the cell phone is on vibrate & she now lost the ONE landline receiver in the black hole. Awesome.

I calmly took the phone off the charger & set the phone on her backpack. As she rushed to get herself together, I noticed she had a different, smaller bag. I asked her about her backpack & she said she didn't need it. I did inform her to check her backpack. She did & said she found the phone. She tried to ask me where it was at.

I told her to have a good day & sent her out the door. I wonder if she'll think through not turning in her phone. Well, at least for a week. The freak-out is WAY better than the grounding!

And it's so worth it, but holding her laptop, iPod & DS hostage in my trunk is pretty entertaining.
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Cleaning Tip: The Darn Thing Was Loaded With Sh...

'...aving cream, be nice clean. Shave everyday and you'll always look keen!'

That's right, I'm going to give you a really-truly-true, really true cleaning tip! Oh, I can hear you --- "Say What?" I know. But sometimes I can come up with a gem or two. And if you haven't figured out - it involves: SHAVING CREAM!

I do not know the science behind it, but it is a killer cleaner! Sinks, tubs, mirrors - seriously! Get the super cheap stuff, no need to make things pricey. Keep. It. Cheap.

Squirt the cream (simmer down & get those minds out of the gutter) all over the surface. Take a scrub brush, or whatever you choose to scrub with, and scrub the entire surface with it. Rinse with water. If the staining is bad enough, use a little bleach or bleach cleaner with it.

I used some on our bathtub yesterday. Hubsy got out of the shower, he asked if I thought it worked. I asked him what he thought. He began to act like he'd been blinded & said he thought a layer of enamel may have been stripped away. This caused me to begin laughing. That's what prompted him saying he sometimes loves my laugh since it sometimes gets a "bat of an eyelash away from snorting".

So, cleaning method: Approved.

See? And it's quick, cheap & easy! (simmer down & get your minds out of the gutter)
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The Dream Predicted This Omelette

Well, let's just get out of the way that today turned into an omelette. With no warning, as usual.

Mondays are when I perform my DOORMAT duties & usually have to deal with my arch nemesis, DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh. But before I get to the actual omelette of a day, let me tell you a back story & I'll go from there:

*insert Wayne's World Flashback sound effect here - DOO-Doo-doo, DOO-Doo-doo*

Bossyhead's teacher found out last year that she had cancer. She & I have a few mutual friends, so I kind of knew what was going on with this teacher. So I thought it was interesting that Bossyhead got her this year. She is doing OK, but still going in for occasional treatments. When she does, there is one teacher that comes in & subs. This is really good for continuity for the kids so they have familiarity with the sub & the sub with them. The kids have an idea of what goes on & they know the schedule of when the sub comes in.

Well, the sub was in this last week on Thursday & Friday. Bossyhead got up today & started talking about the sub. He asked if I knew who she is & when her schedule is. I told him yes. So he said that he had a dream last night that this sub was there on Thursday, Friday AND Monday. I told him that his teacher should be there today.

So, we get around this morning to do my DOORMAT duties (looks like we are back to where we left off). When we got to school, the students from his class were still in the hallway waiting to enter the classroom. The only class waiting to enter their classroom. Finally another teacher stuck her head in the door & then walked out with -------- A SUB!! Not their regularly scheduled one either. I'm talking a chic who had no idea the class was supposed to be greeted at the door, looked like a deer in the headlights. I told her I come in on Mondays to work with the kids & didn't know if she had anything. *receives very blank stare* "Uh - she didn't tell - hmmm - I don't know - *speechless & staring*". She was a total deer in the headlights. That signaled my exit.

There was rain in our area today, the full moon is coming, and this gal is assigned to a class of 1st graders & she doesn't know what she's doing. My kid came home OK, but the neighbor kid talked about what a horrible day it was. I wonder if the sub survived.

But it opened up my morning! And I didn't have to deal with DISORGANIZED DITTO-oh-oh-oh-oh!
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Explaining Lunar-tics

Yesterday, I had to do some driving on the highway to help out with some family stuff. The drivers were CA-RAY-ZAY! And not just one or two - a whole slue of them. And it got me thinking about when this tends to happen - full moon.

Now I used to have a J.O.B. several years ago where I was the main receptionist for several bank branches. Our particular lobby was pretty telling of what the lunar phase was, so much so that I started keeping up on when the full moon was. When it was time for the full moon, I would send an email to all employees that had a LOT of customer contact to beware. And I would always be right. It would be scary the characters & demeanors that would come out during that time. Full-on CA-RAY-ZAY!

Well, I also noticed something else - when the lunar half-moon is out, it brings out the half-wits. Seriously. Watch for it.

So, as I was trying to figure out if it was a full moon, I talked to hubsy to see if he knew. Last night, we looked up & saw ------------------- half-moon. Yes indeed - the half-wits came out to play.

I got thinking about these lunar phases: should we play quarters on the quarter-moon, and should we be baby-making on the baby moon (or practicing)?

Now, you should feel slightly & strangely educated. And beware on the full moon AND half moon. You're welcome.
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