Saturday, November 16, 2013

When The Girls Want to be Exhibitionists

I mean, really.

Really?

Of all times for this to possibly happen, they should not feel the need to wave at everyone & think about entertaining. I mean, really.

Hubsy & I were doing our weekly shopping. Yes, we do this together. It's part of our weekly "date day" while the kids are in school. And we do it at Walmart. Oh - I sense some of you cringing. I can also sense the wanting to get on your "shame-on-you" soapbox. But guess what! It works for us. And we need a lot of stuff. And we save money. That's our biggest deal right now.

But I digress - because the point is we were shopping at Walmart. And I mean a lot of shopping!

Since it's our usual togetherness outing, I try to treat it like a date & try to look decent. This outing had me sporting some red jeggings, a white button-up tunic blouse, a gray cardigan, and a big-and-beautiful deep yellow scarf. Got it in your head? Good. Let's continue...

I have had the blouse for years. It's got an interesting cut, quarter length French cuffs, and an interesting texture to it. But I go a long time between wearing it. Why? Because I forget something about this top. But I'll get to that in a moment.

We strolled through the health/beauty section, and then some of the Christmas layout, and then passed the toys, and then onto some home wares, and electronics, and then pet food, and then smelly good room smells, then to the paper goods - you get the idea.

When we headed into the grocery part of our grocery shopping, I could feel a tickle from my scarf that I wasn't prepared for. Oh, good grief! My top button on the blouse was undone!
So I buttoned it back "discretely", and carried on with my portion of the shopping.

See, Hubsy & I have shopping "zones". I get a particular few things, he gets a particular things, we rendezvous in an aisle & then continue shopping together as we continue tag teaming the shopping trip. I works pretty well for us!

Well, as I was continuing with my portion of the grocery shopping (before the rendezvous point), it seemed a bit breezy. I did notice that I was getting several stares of attention by my bold choice in outfit! And then...after a while I began to realize that, "...my eyes are up here!" Oh no. That top button had gone renegade again! I fixed it as quickly as I could again. And when my hubby came back, he saw me messing with my outfit awkwardly. I told him I was having issues with my upper portion. He kind of rolled his eyes & laughed. That was until I got that scarf tickle again. I began to realize that The Girls, Boo & Bea, had decided this was the day to become exhibitionists. They tried to break free from their brassiere accommodations (aka - prison pods) and wanted to be social at Walmart. They did so by busting another button hole wide open!

As I turned to try to quickly rectify the situation, Hubsy's eyes nearly popped out of his head! I informed him that Boo & Bea may have entertained a few folks along the way, and possibly made some friends. He just figured he did a killer mind trick. He's such a dude sometimes!

Here's the deal: Boo & Bea are not large. Heck, they got up to the modest size they are by me having kids! I'm well endowed compared to what I used to be, but it's nothing to go bragging about. So the fact that they were trying to find the weakness in the blouse tent to freedom is frightening to me!

Oh yes, the twins put on quite a show.
At Walmart.

And so I stopped & buttoned the top 2 buttons of the cardigan to block any of their possible future view! You know what? It worked! Boo & Bea went to sleep after that.

I guess The Girls want to be exhibitionists. Sorry to the guys, but we need to put an end to that pretty quick. I believe this is why I quit wearing this blouse so much.

Oh, by the way, Boo & Bea wanted me to tell you all hello.